Are first impressions really the last impressions?

Its so easy to be judgemental. The more I meet such opinionated duds, more I understand the importance of keeping an open mind while meeting new people n learning new stuff. After all, I feel the most difficult thing to open is a closed mind. 

Please forget everything

This is what I beg of u:

I dont want u to compare me with anyone.

I dont want u make false expectations.

I dont desire a hopeless heart nor do I desire someone’s leftover.

I know u want me, I know u need me, but u carry a great burden upon ur soul, a remembrance of what used to be. That’s ur cross, ur enemy, MY enemy. Its ur misfortune n my obstacle. Its ur gloominess n my challenge. Your deep longing for what used to be mortifies me, slaughters me n makes my life a misery to me….

I used to think of myself as a weak person. A timid individual who’d be shattered if not for her family n friends. But the last couple of days have proved me wrong. & I’m not complaining.  While I thought ”I cant make it”, something in me said “Dont be a fool, U dont stop breathing just coz u r alone”.

It hurts when ppl dont live upto our expectations but then again, who’s asking me to expect. No one. Sometimes I feel relationships make a person vulnerable n emotional. The more ppl u have (or u THINK u have) around u, the more do u look forward for help from atleast one of them.

Ive realised that Im betteroff without anybody around me. Its my battle alone n Im determined to fight it all by myself. Its only when all masks are washed away that I see what bothers me. Im saying this again: These are my wars n Im gonna fight them on my own. No angel can save me. I dont need any of those in the first place.

Sound Check

Consider this: Im at the hospital where my loved one is admitted, in the ICU. Am waiting outside for the medical reports n every second feels like a decade. All Im trying to do is say my most sincere prayers when someone from behind shouts in Marathi ”WHY DID THIS HAPPEN TO HIM” shattering the deadly silence. With due respect to her feelings n emotions, I just wanted to go upto her n say I dont understand why do some people howl on top of their lungs in the name of talking!

Come June 2nd n Aerosmith will be performing in Bangalore. I dunno if ‘ll be able to go. Damn it yaar! Agreed that as compared to my betterhalf ( a crazy n absolute rocker) n other metalhead pals my knowledge in this genre of music is in the -ve quadrant, but thats not the point! All I know is that I need huge doses of rock music to keep me going. N that I wanna be there (PALACE GROUNDS/BANGALORE) on June 2nd! But only a miracle will help me get there. I have never missed CTRL F so much in the last 25 years of my life!!!!!!!!!!! 

ENLIGHTENMENT: When the questions still exist but their answers dont matter anymore!!!! 

But, WHY???

I’d read lots abt this movie “Eklavya”, with a multi star cast. Demi-God – Mr. Bachchan, Mrs. Nawaab – Sharmila Tagore, Chhote Nawaab - Mr. Saif Ali Khan, one -film-wonder – Vidya Balan (same fuckin expression in every movie, AAAAAAARRRRGGGGGG), Boman Irani (I JUST LOVE THIS MAN), Jackie Shroff, Sanjay Dutt n Jimmy Shergill, phew….. Wanted to see what this movie was abt coz the promos looked really exotic with all these Jaipur palaces beautifully lit,  awesome locales n all… N boy, i got to catch up that movie tonite (just sometime back). Now for a lil review from this lame duck:

Awrite, first things first: Cinematography – BRILLIANT, Costumes – WOWIIEEE n thats abt it. Dint understand one word of what Vidya was saying (Man that woman needs to shake her Godforsaken vocal chords a bit to get some sound outta her). She was whispering all thru the movie. WHY? 

I dunno wat Jimmy was doing with his BLING BLING shoes n weird hairdo n all! Again WHY??

Jackie Shroff… Now Ive seen this man from like 5 feet away during my college function n he still looks the same!! Totally wasted in this movie… AGAIN WHY???    

Boman Irani – Sincere performance with his wig ( I loved the seen where he starts crying wildly n in an attempt to show what TEARING APART UR HAIR is all abt, he pulls out his wig, LOLZZ). But alas… AGAIN WHY????

Sharmila Tagore – Easily the easiest role ever (even I cud have played this part with easeeeeee). All she had to do was to lay down in RAJA RANI ka bed, look tired (with abt 3 inches of make up on) n keep saying EKLAVYA, EKLAVYA…. throughout the lifespan of her role (which was abt for 3 minutes)… AGAIN WHY?????

Saif Ali Khan - I kinda liked him in this movie(So I wont say anything more abt Chhote Nawaab n his performance), probably coz the other characters wer serioulsy pathetic. AGAIN WHY??????

Sanjay Dutt – Good comic timing n I will stop it there…..

Finally, AB – Now WHY ON EARTH DID THIS MAN CHOSE TO PLAY A PART IN THIS MOVIE?????????????????????????????? May be he needed money to pay for his son’s wedding! I think that cud have been the only reason for a man of his stature to accept such a sad role! I cant believe that the director of the movie, Mr. V V Chopra gifted a ROLLS ROYCE to AB for his performance!!! AGAIN WHY?????????????????

Towards the end of the movie they showed this interview of the director where he said he spent 5 years writing this movie. WHAT?? 5 FUCKIN YEARS??????????? For wat?? WRITING THIS MOVIE?????? Man, after the hour n a half torture of watching this movie n ur hilariouos i’view (5 YEARS FOR WRITING THIS GODDAMN MOVIE, WHY?????????), I think u’d have lost abt 1000 pages of ur script which is why this film bombed at the BO…

I was so filled with ideas for my blog n look what ur movie has done to me Mr. Chopra! U OWE ME ONE!!!!

Funny Man

A lot of people have told me this abt u “He seems to be a quiet n serious guy, while u r absolutely crazy!”. True.  But what these people dont get to see is how DEVILISH u can get!!!! Probably u like to keep it that way. Have shared many many wonderful moments with u where Ive laughed so much that my eyes used to get filled with tears. This still happens with me, very often. Now, I’m unable to resist the urge to put some of those pathetic jokes here.

Me: Look at Shell n Ash… They are such a wonderful couple, they eat from the same plate n share everything. Y cant u be like Shell?

U: Now, eating from the same plate… EEKSS…. that’s unhygenic. Share everything? Here’s the bill… 50-50?

Me: Hey I’ll show u one building (my intention will be that of telling u what that building is… as in my college or stuff like that) 

U: Oh, u’ll show me one building?? I’ll show u many buildings!!!!!

Me (in a romantic mood): If u wer to dedicate a song to me, which one wud that be?

U: “LE GAYI DIL MERA MANCHALI, KHALIBALI KHALIBALI KHALIBALI……

Me: Hey, u know wat, we shud take a cute romantic pic of urs n upload it on Orkut.

U: Yeah n it shud be something like I’m reading the newspaper n u r coming with a cook’s knife from behnd to chop me down… Howzzat??

Howzzzaatt???

Ice Cold

Someone told me today: “U cudnt have been more indifferent.”

Probably its time for something called “INTROSPECTION”

5 things that I’ve learnt…

One day that I wanted to come back home early to be with my family, the system cudnt handle it… It crashed!!! DAMN. While Big Bee has called me many a times for some blazing gyaan sessions, the one thats coming to my mind rite now is one fierry session where he asked me what I’d learnt all this while. So Big Bee, here I go:

1. If I wanna get to the top, I better be prepared to kiss a lotta bottom.
2. Leaders are like eagles. I havent seen either of them till date. Sorry.
3. As long as I have u, I’ll never run outta any problems.
4. A few harmless flakes working together can unleash an avalanche of destruction.
5. Power corrupts. Absolute power corrupts absoultely. But it ABSOLUTELY ROCKS TOOOOO!!

Awritee.. I better get back to work, any which ways I’m not being paid to believe in the power of my dreams….